I'm a workaholic. There is no denying that. I often complain that there aren't enough hours in a day - I have to find peace in the unfinished to-do lists, push the coffee away, and force myself go to sleep at night. I sometimes reward myself with an hour of Netflix. But otherwise, my life consists of work, work, and more work.
It's not that I don't love it. I love everything I do, everything I'm a part of. It's the reason I get up before the sun rises and commit to the "grind" for every ensuing hour. It's just that I lose perspective on what else is important in my life once the hours and days blur together. The satisfaction in the "ding" my laptop sings when I check another item off my marathon to-do list echoes one of the central ways I determine my worth: by daily productivity.
My cousin Lauren came to stay with me in Boulder for her spring break. She was here for five days. I decided to use it as an opportunity to stop the productivity and bring back some authentic playtime into my life. I turned on the dreaded "out of the office / vacation" settings in my email, and while writing the automated response, had to physically stop myself from writing "sorry" more than once. "I'm sorry I'm not available." "I'm sorry for the delay." Why do we feel the need to say SORRY for taking a moment to claim our own lives? I did.
At first, it was uncomfortable. I cringe as I say that. Ask Lauren - I was unable to stop myself from periodically sitting down with my European History textbook or getting a head start on some homework. As I said, I love it. But here's what I love more:
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Blog Contributed by Haley Hoffman Smith
Photo Donated by Alyssa Volker Photography